I was so excited. I was getting a makeover from Chanel! I’m a huge fan of Chanel makeup. I have a ton of Joues Contraste Powder Blushes, lipsticks, Glossimers, some miscellaneous eye shadows and other powders. Let’s just say I have a lot of Chanel makeup. When my favorite Sales Associate (SA) told me that one of Chanel’s alleged top Makeup Artists (MA) was coming to do makeovers, I got an appointment! Oh wait….you just read the word “alleged” perhaps, you think to yourself, PinkSith’s experience with the MA wasn’t as nice as originally thought. With that thought you have solved the mystery. The MA wasn’t just bad, she SUCKED.
Let’s start from the beginning shall we? I arrived on time for my appointment. The wonderful SA I go to at my local Nordstrom was there to greet me. She really is a doll. I love her to death. She’s always nice, isn’t pushy and gives me samples all the time. What’s not to like? Exactly. She had no control over the Mary Kay commando that was disguised as the Chanel MA who did my makeup.
Actually, there were 2 MAs and they worked in a typical tag team. One did skin the other color. The lady doing my skin was nice enough but had no idea what a blog was or how or why people wrote them or read them. My attempt to explain that I’m incredibly narcissistic, like to hear my own voice, and have nothing better to do with my time didn’t seem to get to her. I think I lost her at the word narcissistic. After the Skin MA did her “Magic” The Color MA started on foundation matching. She decided to use the lightest (Porcelain) Mat Lumiere foundation on me…the next shade up (Claire) was too yellow, the porcelain was too pink, but they used it anyway. Whatever. It’s not Chanel’s fault for not having a perfect shade match…is it?
Then she started to pencil in my brows. As you can see from my before picture. My eyebrows are non existent. Well. They exist there is eyebrow hair there, but it’s so blond you can’t see it. I normally use a combination of pencil and powder to sculpt and shape the brows. What this SA did to my loverly eyebrows was obscene. I had to ask her to darken them in a bit more because they looked like two light brown blobs on top of my eyes. Bleh.
She started to work on my eyes. I told her I normally wear taupe (duh) shadows but I was open to color. I also told her I favored the Chanel singles but I also liked some of the quads so either one would be fine. She noted my eyes looked green and that using purple would really bring them out. Ugh. The whole “Wear purple so your green eyes look green.” is annoying. I was willing to experiment and agreed to purple shadow. What did she reach for first? The Chanel Irreelle Duo in Orient Express. It’s an eye shadow duo with a blue based purple and a light baby pink. So NOT my colors. She combined those two heinous shades with Chanel single eye shadows in Island (a frosty peach) and Cinnamon (a warm brown). Ummm OK. A pencil liner in Violine (Warm Purple) was used under my eyes followed by more of the purple part of the duo. Viola! She was finished! When I looked in the mirror I almost laughed out loud. The application was a mess…sloppy and the colors were so muddled on me I looked like I was sick. The purple liner was a red based purple and the blue based shadow looked so awful together it made me look like I had the flu!
While I hated to do it, I had to ask her to start again, I seriously looked like such a fright that I was embarrassed to even pretend that it looked good. I asked if maybe she could just do a neutral taupe eye. I hated having to direct her, but upon telling her 3 or 4 times that I really liked neutrals and taupes she wasn’t getting it. Finally she reached for the Crystal Dusk duo and started to do my eye again. She started with the same Chanel single in Island as a base. (whatever) and then mixed the 2 colors from Crystal Dusk together, explaining that Chanel wants you to mix them. (OK sure) She said she used that in the crease and then took Chanel single in Ivory to highlight, Chanel Ecriture liquid eyeliner pen, and a Chanel Pencil in Denim to line the bottom of my eyes. She finished with a less than spectacular application of the Chanel Inimitable Mascara in black on the top and BOTTOM lashes! Yikes!
But the piece de resistance was the blush and application. This demonic and inept MA applied a thick layer of Rose Bronze blush from the apples of my cheeks up to past my temples. Helloooooo 1986 is over lady! I don’t know if she was mad at me so she made me look like a clown or if she really was just bad at applying makeup. I should have been concerned when her own makeup, while applied better on her than on me, looked like it was layered on with a trowel. Ugh. She put on Meteore Glossimer from the new collection and just called it a day.
Funny thing about the whole experience, The MA, Vicki*, knew I had a blog and I told her I was going to be writing about this. When asked if I could take her picture she said no. (I'm OK with that), she said she had been working as a MA since she was 16 and she was over 40 now. She said she worked for Shiseido. When I mentioned that I love Cle de Peau she had no idea what I was talking about (CdP is a higher end brand owned by Shiseido). Nor did she know anything about the Shiseido brands in Japan. I asked how you pronounce Joues Contraste and she said she didn't know and just referred to it as powder blush. That "none of us use the French names for the makeup". Lastly when I asked if it was harder to apply someone elses makeup she said. Not at all. "I've been doing it so long it's really easy." OK. Vicki! Whatever you say!
I did purchase a few things 2 glossimers and the Crystal Dusk duo. I got a nice little GWP which you all will see tomorrow, with the items I purchased and a review. For now, take a look of the Before & After photos AND photos of my own makeup application with the items I purchased and with some of my existing Chanel
Me sans any real makeup. I'm wearing BB Cream, Concealer and Chanel Wild Rose Glossimer
Note the non existant brows and invisible eyelashes.
Me with my horrendous Chanel Makeover. (All times Chanel) Mat Lumiere foundation in Porcelain, Poudre Universelle in Translucent 1, Rose Bronze Joues Contraste Blush, Island Eyeshado, Crystal Dusk Duo, Denim Liner, and Inimitable Mascara. Note the dark curcles under my eyes from the mascara already starting to transfer, the bad color match between my neck and face, and the heinous blush application.
My full Face makeup done by ME! I used. Fresh Umbrian Clay Foundation in 7th Veil, Cle de Peau Conceaker in Ivory, La Mer Translucent loos powder, Chanel JC Blush in Rose Petale, Chanel Irreelle Duo in Crystal Dusk, Chanel Ecriture Liquid eyeliner in Noir, Shu Uemura The Basic Mascara, Maybellibe Colossal Volume Mascara, Chanel lip liner in Nude, Chanel Glossimer in Cosmos. Note. Better brows better lighting...sorry but I didn't feel like running out to my car to take a picture this time.
The Chanel MA Blush application. Notice it goes past my temples and is very heavy handed.
*names have NOT been changed to protect the inept.