Review by Joeybunny - The Laser Chronicles, Part II

It’s time for another installment of Joey’s “The Laser Chronicles”!

As you may remember, I have decided to undergo a series of procedures at American Laser Centers: the FotoFacial, which uses laser technology to exfoliate, break up discoloration in the skin, and bring a general brightness and glow to the complexion; microdermabrasion (which works in conjunction with the FotoFacial to remove the dull skin layers); and laser hair removal for the underarms and the lady garden (the bikini area, for those of you who don’t like flowery nicknames for the vagina/labia). Part I of The Laser Chronicles brought you my first FotoFacial, and my first round of laser hair removal for the underarms.

The verdict: Two weeks later, and I’ve noticed less hair growth in the bunny pits already. The results of the FotoFacial were so impressive that my beloved Ladyboss decided to spring for the same round of treatments I’m getting, minus the pit hair removal. Seriously, she took one look at my face and called the Central Park ALC office immediately. Not joking! My skin was bright and glowy, with minimal downtime (I was a little red for maybe an hour or two), and I noticed that my skincare products were more effective (i.e. my moisturizers sink into my skin quickly now!).

So, two weeks ago I had my second round of treatments: microdermabrasion and lady garden laser hair removal. Darling Libby started me with the laser hair removal.

(Yay, no more lady lawn mowing for me! Haha!)

Now, if you remember from my last entry, I said that the FotoFacial and the underarm laser hair removal didn’t hurt at all. Well, I’d be lying to you if I said that the bikini laser hair removal wasn’t a little painful. It was. I yelped. I yelped a lot. Sweet Libby was very apologetic, but seeing as I decided to go for the Full Monty (laser hair removal front and back, inside and out), there really wasn’t a way to avoid the little bit of pain. I am not quite sure what was more uncomfortable - the laser (especially when it went over areas with ingrown hairs) or the ice packs I had to place on my bits before the treatment started. I think I’ll go with the ice packs. Really, this was actually less uncomfortable and more dignified than a bikini wax. It was nice to not be yelling in pain while having hot wax ripped from my lady garden while on my hands and knees - you know you’ve been there, if you’ve waxed. By the end, I was laughing: Libby and I were cracking jokes, plus the sensation became more bearable. In terms of the results, I have noticed in the past two weeks that my hair growth has slowed. Also, some of my ingrown hairs have finally grown out! I’m excited.

(Don't ask why I included this picture. This has nothing to do with anything but a certain someone I know told me to include it because I was talking about lady gardens. And I love llamas!)

After the lady garden pruning was taken care of, Libby moved to microdermabrasion. For those of you who don’t know, microdermabrasion uses jets of aluminum oxide crystals to exfoliate the top layer of skin. This helps to lessen the appearance sun spots, scarring, discoloration, etc. It’s not very painful - ladyboss thought it was a little painful, but I didn’t feel it at all. My face was a little red for maybe a few minutes after, but the smoothness and glow of my skin was just incredible! Ladyboss said that after she had her microderm done, men kept catcalling her on the street (although ladyboss is hot and I bet this might have happened regardless!). I bounced out of the ALC office with a confidence I haven’t felt in a while. Two weeks later, I’ve noticed fading of a few acne scars I have around my mouth, and my nose is happily devoid of blackheads.

So there you go! Sometime next week I’ll have Part III of the Laser Chronicles, when I go back for FotoFacial #2. Once again, I encourage anyone in the NYC/Tri-State area to check out the Central Park location (57 W.58th St, 212-871-0551) if you’re interested in any of the services American Laser Centers offers. Say Josie sent you - they’re currently offering some great deals on treatment packages!

PS - For anyone who is curious, at the end of this series I’ll have before and after pictures of my skin and my underarms. I’ll have before and after pictures of my bikini area too, but that’s strictly for Elvira to see - lucky her!