Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Models Own Nail Polish in Indian Ocean - Review, Pictures, Swatches

Indian Ocean three coats. Shot indoors under Ott light, no flash
When I first saw pictures of Models Own Indian Ocean I was entranced. THIS was the ULTIMATE nail polish color that I was looking for all my life.  Yes. It was perfect.  A sweet baby blue with a gold to pink to peach duochrome. If anything more precious ever existed on this planet it would still not rival the beauty of Models Own Indian Ocean nail polish.  If Mermaids could cry THIS would be the color of their tears.  Indian Ocean is the color of MERMAID TEARS for cryin' out loud!  How much more precious could one thing be?

Indian Ocean three coats. Shot indoors under Ott light, no flash
Once upon a time there was a mermaid that longed to be human.  (This story in no way shape or form resembles Disney's The Little Mermaid. Any similarities to Disney Characters alive or dead is simply coincidental.)  This mermaid was named Ari....Bariel.  Yeah. Bariel.  And she had long re...auburn hair and beautiful blu...purple eyes.  She was bored being a mermaid. She had seen the seven seas and explored all there was to see in the ocean. Considering that over 70% of the earth is covered in salt water oceans, that's a lot to see. She had also been disappointed in her dating prospects.  All the mermen were kind of prissy, the Sharks were total jerks, the whales too intellectual and snobby, the dolphins were never serious and always clowning around.  It was hard to find a man to settle down with.

Indian Ocean three coats. Shot indoors under Ott light, no flash. Enlarged to show color shift.

Bariel's favorite show was "Sex In The City"  She would watch TV off of a pilfered cable that ran underwater from the main land. After watching several seasons of the show, Bariel decided the best place to find a man would be Manhattan.  Why?  Because the women that live there are all so neurotic or insecure that certainly no man would put up with such BS for very long.  She was down to earth. (so to speak) and had no hang ups. Certainly the men of Manhattan would find her a prize catch...pardon the pun.  Best of all, she had no feet so she never worried about spending money on shoes.

Indian Ocean three coats. Shot indoors under Ott light, no flash
So how was she supposed to become human?  It had been rumored that a great sea witch could cast a spell and give her human legs and a human heart and lungs.  But would she dare?  What if her spell was reversible and she had to go back to being a mermaid.  She never wanted to go back.  Then it was rumored that mermaids that spent too much time out of water would instantly grow legs and there would be no issue.  She could grow legs and then when she went back into the water she would have her mermaid tail once again.  However, it did pose a problem if one were going to shower or take a bath.  Would fresh water change her back to a mermaid  or was it only salt water?

2 coats Indian Ocean over 1 coat Illamasqua nail polish in Caress. Outside in direct sunlight.
Then there was the problem of establishing an identity.  Being born under the sea there was no social security office so she had no number.  She also had no birth certificate nor way to establish citizenship.  This would prove difficult if Bariel wanted to get a credit card.  How else would she get that Birkin Bag that the whore Samantha was always going on about on that show.

2 coats Indian Ocean over 1 coat Illamasqua nail polish in Caress. Outside in direct sunlight.
Oh, then there was the issue of language.  While Bariel understood English she had a different lung structure than humans so speaking was very different for her.  She had to ponder how breathing air would be possible.  It's not like she had a blow hole like whales or dolphins, but she didn't have gills like a fish either.  In fact, the whole anatomy of a mermaid was very confusing.  How in the hell did they breathe under water AND still breathe above water?  Was she some kind of fish/mammal hybrid like Kevin Costner in that awful "Waterworld" movie?  Just thinking about that Mad Max at sea movie made her head hurt.

2 coats Indian Ocean over 1 coat Illamasqua nail polish in Caress. Outside in direct sunlight.
OK. So she had no identity, no idea how her anatomy allowed her to breathe, she had no idea how to  get legs and how she would be able to walk without ever having legs before. She also had the issue with clothing.  As it seemed that all clothing came from small boutiques and was sold by either flamboyantly gay men (which she was sure would be the ideal job of a Mermen if they were ever human) or bitter older women that treated customers like pond scum....literally.  After all, Bariel's only view of the world was what she saw on TV.  And you know how accurate TV is with real life.

three coats Indian Ocean with hexagonal color shifting iridescent white craft glitter on tips. Indoors with flash.
The overwhelming obstacles on becoming a human, surviving as a human and living the rest of her life as a human finally got to Bariel and she started to cry. Large mermaid tears fell from her cheeks.  She finally realized that it would be impossible to become human. The seaweed is always greener in somebody else's lake. Maybe life on land wouldn't be as easy as she thought.  Maybe she would have to get a job and work long hours just to afford to rent a crappy one room apartment in Manhattan. She probably wouldn't even be able to afford designer clothing and shoes and long weekends in the Hampton's, eating out every night and drinking until dawn.  She would probably catch some nasty disease from consorting with so many men and end up lonely and alone.  Maybe TV shows weren't as accurate about real life as she thought.   Under the sea is where she belonged.  Oh and it was 8:00 and Gossip Girl was on the CW. Now THAT is reality TV, thought Bariel!

three coats Indian Ocean with hexagonal color shifting iridescent white craft glitter on tips. Indoors with flash.

27 comments:

  1. You might me my favourite blogger in the whole wide world :)x

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  2. I love it layered over white. Reminds me a smidgen of Hard Candy Sky but a touch more iridescent which makes it that much cooler. Love what you did with the accent glitter, too!

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    1. I tried it over white bout my application technique made it look streaky...of course I could try again! And thanks, the glitter was a PITA to remove, even with the foil method.

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  3. Great swatches, and your little story about Bariel made me laugh so much!

    Alice

    http://www.SecretsOfAWannabeCharlotte.blogspot.co.uk

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    1. Thanks! I appreciate it. Just to let you know. In the future please do not add your blog link to the comments. If you want to be part of my link love/blog roll I'll be happy to add you if you add me back!

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  4. Wow you have lust-worthy nails. I'm super jealous.

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    1. Thank you! It's mostly genetics but also Dermelect Launch Pad and Dermalect Ridge filler. They make my nails super strong!

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  5. I was debating getting this the other day ...I didn't ...now I'm wishing I had!!

    This is GORGEOUS!!!

    x

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    1. Aww. nothing worse than shoppers remorse.

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  6. i love it layered over that illamasqua nail varnish, it's generally just gorgeous, wish it hadn't sold out
    and your story about Ari.. Bariel was hilarious, giggled so much!

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    1. :-) Glad you liked the story. Hopefully it will be back in stock soon.

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  7. Only you, Elvira, could have come up with that from a nail polish. Pure <3.
    I have Indian Ocean, it's gorgeous but I hate how much work I have to do before I can get it look like it does in the bottle. WHY SO SHEER DARNIT!!?!!

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    1. I know! I wish it wasn't as sheer as it is. It bums me out.

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  8. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA a fish/mammal hybrid like Kevin Costner hahahaha that cracked me up!
    You are amazing. :)
    LOVE this polish! Your nails are amazing.

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    1. LOL! Glad you caught the Kevin Costner joke. :-)

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  9. I've wanted this since I first saw it, now I need it even more! Oh, and I nearly wet myself.

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    1. LOL!!! Well wear some depends the next time you read my blog. :-P

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    2. Whoo, picked up this and 4 others in a 50% off sale. Happy me.

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  10. Ooooh, amazing! Loved the story :) just hilarious! I really do need this nail varnish in my life, its just so darn gorgeous! x

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  11. Ooooh, I love it with the glitter on the tips! Gorgeous!

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    1. Thanks! I liked the glitter look the best. :-)

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  12. That is sooo pretty 0_0 I must have it!

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